Thursday, December 27, 2012

Bjork : Possibly Maybe

Possibly, Maybe...


 Probably not.


The world's shortest fairytale: 

Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl, "Will you marry me?" The girl said,"No," and she lived happily ever after and went shopping, drank martinis with her friends, always had a clean house, never had to cook, had a closet full of shoes and handbags, stayed skinny, and was never farted on. 

The End

Thursday, December 13, 2012


In this technological day-of-age with Facebook, Twitter, AND Instagram, there is less need for blogs. I am not saying I am done done... but I am taking a hiatus until I really feel like I have something worthy to blog about.

Monday, October 15, 2012

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Friday, September 21, 2012

Flaming Canyon

Just stumbled upon this website:
This guy is amazing.
I must go to Southern Utah SOOOON!!!

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Beetlejuice! Beetlejuice!....

I'm the ghost with the most, babe.

Wednesday, September 19, 2012


Normal Day

“Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are. Let me learn from you, love you, bless you before you depart. Let me not pass you by in quest of some rare and perfect tomorrow. Let me hold you while I may, for it may not always be so. One day I shall dig my nails into the earth, or bury my face in the pillow, or stretch myself taut, or raise my hands to the sky and want, more than all the world, your return.”
~Mary Jean Irion 

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Tetons, WY

I visited a few of my loves last week...
Off roading

Osho inspiration

A Man who Is Filled with Love Is in Heaven

“Without love a man stands alone, separated from the core of existence. Without love everyone is a lone entity, lacking any connection with others of his kind. Today, man finds himself totally alone. We are all shut off from each other, trapped within ourselves. This is like being in the grave. Even though he is alive, man is a corpse."


Osho and the Huna beard
we are stars
linked by the Nothing
tears of rain on dried ground
caress of wind
orgasm of fire in cup of love
remembrance that mangles
magic which laughs
infinite and immense quantum
of silence and light
(photo provided by

Monday, August 27, 2012

Ariele Day!

It's my favorite girls birthday today, so...


Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Thursday, March 29, 2012


So I haven't blogged since I left the country and there is good reason for that: I have not had ANY time to do so. (Also, for the first week I didn't have internet service.) I still don't have much time to blog, but I just wanted to quickly share the exciting news I got today. Today, I got my details!
After only three weeks of training in London (very strenuous and stressful training, might I add), I have gotten the details of my ship!!! This has happened rather quickly for me, as some people get stuck in training for 6, 7, 8+ weeks!!
Wanna know where I'm going?! --Ready for this?-- I'm going on the Disney Cruise line! My ship is called the Disney Dream.
This is hilarious for SO many reasons:
1- Because it was the one cruise line I joked I would get, but didn't want to due to my lack of excitement towards children.
2- Because EVERYONE back home joked that I would get put on the Disney Cruise ship.
3- Because everyone at the Steiner Academy said that I would be perfect for the Disney Cruise ship.
4- Because every day at the Steiner Academy I sang Disney songs while we did our afternoon cleaning.
and finally...
5- Because deep down I really love Disney and I know I am going to have a BLAST on their ship!
The part I wasn't initially stoked on is that my port is in Florida. I was hoping to get OUT of the states. However, I AM excited that my whole cruise travels will be to islands! The Bahamas, The Caribbean, the Florida Keys, etc.
Did you know that Disney owns their own island?... of course they do. It's called Castaway Cay.
So to wrap it up, I leave on Monday April 2nd, and join my ship on Thursday April 5th. From that point on it is all sea from there! Super excited to see what sea life is all about!
Bon Voyage!

Friday, March 2, 2012

Q: Crystal, where will your cruise be going?

A: I don't know!

"It's like being blindfolded and throwing a dart at a map."

Wednesday, February 29, 2012


'Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater.
If you give her sperm, she'll give you a baby.
If you give her a house, she'll give you a home.
If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal.
If you give her a smile, she'll give you her heart.
She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her.
So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of shit.'

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Monday, February 20, 2012

Sunday, February 19, 2012


"Somebody at one of these places asked me: "What do you do? How do you write, create?" You don't, I told them. You don't try. That's very important: not to try, either for Cadillacs, creation or immortality. You wait, and if nothing happens, you wait some more. It's like a bug high on the wall. You wait for it to come to you. When it gets close enough you reach out, slap out and kill it. Or if you like it's looks, you make a pet out of it."
- Charles Bukowski

Master of Influence

This weekend I went to a three day seminar titled "Master of Influence." I went because I was lucky enough to have a job that brought in Kirk Duncan to one of our meetings to give us a taste of what he offers. What attracted me most to his presentation was discussing the study of body language. I work with the human body every day and just like every one else, I have relationships with people who all have bodies. Therefore, I have always believed it is of the upmost importance to understand those bodies.
"If you understand one body, you understand every body."

Did you know that only 7% of communication comes through in the words we say? (Only SEVEN percent!) 36% is in tone and a whole whoping 57% is in gestures! What people say could often be very different from what they're thinking or feeling. It's very easy to say something untrue or insincere, so we can never rely fully on words alone.
The most effective way to uncover hidden desires, thoughts, or emotions is by reading and interpreting body language correctly. Thanks to this seminar, I now know how to do that. But it's not just understanding other people's body language, it's also about understanding your own body language and how it is influencing others.

Learning to read body language was only a portion of what was covered in this seminar. I could write an entire book about what I learned in this seminar. But that would be unfair. To obtain the knowledge I learned I gladly paid for, as should anyone who is interested in learning more on this topic (which should be everyone). The benefits I am, and will be, reaping from this class are priceless and innumberable.

I was so moved, motivated, and touched by this seminar I have decided to continue studying this topic. Timing is not right for me to do it now since I am leaving to work on a cruise ship for the remainder of this year. But I have officially decided that when I come back I am going to take the class to learn to become a mentor. I have always felt that my purpose in life is to help others. Fortunately, I get to help others physically every day in my current career as a Massage Therapist. But I am meant for more. I want to be able to help people in their every day lives. Help them find their message and their purpose on this planet. Help motivate them to tap into their higher power and function at the best that they can.

Life is funny, just a few years ago I was craving a life mentor of my own and now I want to become one. Just goes to show that if you create a relationship with your higher self and really listen to the messages the universe is sending you, all of your questions will be answered.

If you want to know more about the seminar I attended or the company that offered the seminar here is their website:
I cannot fully express through words how much I encourage everyone to take this seminar. If we can all learn how to communicate with each other and ourselves more appropriately this world would be a much brighter place.
Peace and love to every one.

Wednesday, February 15, 2012


It has been published!!!
I am so freakin proud of my Jak. This comic is amazing as is all of his writings!
I can't wait to have a first edition signed copy in my hand!!!
Cheers to making dreams come true!

Tuesday, February 14, 2012


Today some people are happy to be in a relationship.
Some people are happy to not be in a relationship.
I'm just happy I don't work at a flower shop anymore.
Love to all on this day of love.

Sunday, January 29, 2012


It's finally time for me to officially spread the word about my big news. I recently obtained a job working with the Steiner Company aboard one of their cruise ships!!! To work aboard a cruise ship has been a dream of mine for as long as I can remember. Words can't describe how ecstatic I am about this.
I went to Vegas at the beginning of Decemeber to interview. It was a long, intimidating process. Out of 30 people, 2 people got the job. One of those people was ME!!!
I will be heading to London on March 10th where I will comense training. Training can take anywhere from 2-8 weeks depending on how quickly you pick it all up. (So I'm sure I'll be done in 2 weeks. :P ) AFTER that is when they will tell me what ship I will be on and where I am going. (Steiner owns all the cruise lines except 2, and I forget which those are.)
Once I'm on the ship, my 9 month contract begins. This of course means that I will be gone until probably January 2013. (Yes I will be spending the possible apocolypse on a ship.)
This is a very big deal for me. The idea of being away from my loved ones for 9 whole months is scary and intimidating. As is working for 12 hours a day, 6 days a week! BUT I know that this is exactly what I need. I need to get out of my comfort zone. Away from the people I hide behind and drown myself in. Time for me to just be ME. By myself. To rediscover who I am.
No phone and limited internet access. Just me, my massages, and the open ocean.
Bon Voyage Land!!!

Thursday, January 26, 2012


"Sit down before fact as a little child, be prepared to give up every preconceived notion, follow humbly wherever and to whatever abyss nature leads, or you shall learn nothing."
~Thomas Huxley

Monday, January 23, 2012

This is sex without touching.

Saturday, January 21, 2012

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

The Good Ship Lifestyle

This is the Good Ship Lifestyle
All my friends jumped ship
I elect ME the captain
This is the lonliest voyage
I've ever been on
Up in the crow's nest
-Over there! I see land!
First mate?
There is no First Mate...
This is the Good Ship Lifestyle!
Sail away from the world!
Sail away from the world!
So steer a course
A course for nowhere
And drop the anchor
My little Empire
I'm going nowhere
This is the Good Ship Lifestyle!
(Soon to be my theme song)

Come alive!

Dexter Legos

This is beyond awesome!!! HAHAHA!!!

Sunday, January 8, 2012

Lao Tzu

“When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.”

Non-attachment – even or especially to ones own self-image – is the necessity for personal change. If we are open to change and to new possibilities and perspectives, without buying into them blindly, we can grow.

Daddy Long Legs

"Where was mother nature? Sleeping? Coffee break"

You're welcome.

Friday, January 6, 2012

Massage quote

"Without the loosening effects of massage, shoulders would stiffen into immobility and fall victim to freeloading parrots and the burden of carrying Earth's heavy-set brother, Girth."

Monday, January 2, 2012